day 31 and counting

i've been @ the computer about 2.5 hours right now answering emails and writing. I split my time between thinking, reflecting, praying and just generally holding a divine tension in my thoughts PDL? Understanding your shape; the combination of my abilities, personality and experiences... See if you can relate to this one. I'm profoundly suspicious of my personality ever since the Undefended Love workshop. What is this assemblage of reactions, needs, desires and compensatory identities that I call my personality and how trustworthy is it in face of all of the change growth and evolution, both personal and collective that I am immersed in? How much can I depend on these experiences that I think have shaped my life when I now know that I created those VERY experiences out of my perceptions and then the story I told myself about those perceptions. Pema Chodron in The Wisdom of No Escape No such thing as a true story!!! NO such thing as a true story. No matter what I am telling myself about what happened there is NO SUCH THING AS A TRUE STORY and as soon as I think there is, I have closed myself off to all forms of fresh and creative thinking ... I have closed myslef off to the Tao, to God. There is ample truth for this in all of our collective lived experience and in our individual experience. I dont have to scratch the surface very far or even go back beyond ... my thoughts of 30 minutes ago to get plenty of evidence for this one.

i'm stepping out and exploring and all around me people are doing the same, just as other epole are becoming more entrenched in thier beliefs. I'm speaking on EVERY scale now, global, national, local, ... hell even within the Centre.
Buddhism is not free of it they coined the phrase", "if you see the Buddha on the road, kill him". ... christianity is not free of it, Islam is not free of it the USA is not free of it, Canada, Burundi, Vanuatu ... are not free of it and CPL is NOT free of it. If you see Ernest Holmes on the road or anyone who looks like him ... KILL him!

"God once decided to teach his loyal believers a lesson. They were hard at work each group in their respective fields on either side of a road that divided them. They liked each other, were pleasant to one another and beleived firmly in what ... they believed was the truth. One day God walked down the road smiling and waving and wearing a hat that was red on one side and green on the other. All of the people smiled and waved back and congratulated themselves that they ahd had an expereince of God. They stayed together and shared their experience andas long as they did so things went well. At one point one of the group approached a member of the group across the raod and in passing said that he had truly admired God's red hat. "What do you mean red hat? It was green," the other said ... or words to that effect. I guess it always depend on that personalities, abilities and experiences of the interlocutors how they will respond to one another. Let's assume this exchange was a little bit to the right of warm and cuddly.

Well a jihad came out of this disagreement which threatened world peace and the survival of all life on the planet ... oops wrong story! ... the peace and contentment of the spiritual community.

God watched this unfold for a while and said enough of this bullshit and walked back in the opposite direction showing the opposite sides of the hat to the startled and ... hmmm How did they receive this "new Revelation"?
Well Pema says they immediately began to stammer "Ah you were right. He did have on a red hat. We're so sorry, we just saw incorrectly. The other side said, "No no YOU we're right and we were wrong."

And so began another story that is simply NOT true. Just another story ... just another story